Wednesday, August 13, 2014

My health fight

So we enter the second month of  #wia100healthydays and while the first month was a bust in terms of eating clean. I did try my best to keep my eating "sort-of" healthy

During Ramadaan and post that, I had to pack up my moms house, and the only thing that kept me from eating through my feelings was the fact that the house was a buidling site and everything was covered in dust. Which made it unappetising to even your biggest emotional eaters

While I didn't lose much, (2 kgs) I gave myself a high 5 for not weighing the same as my fridge. I did get a shit load of strength training, by sanding and plastering walls, painting etc.

But to get back into the swing of things, I signed up for the 360 30 Day Summer Body Program which was offered at just R99 for the month. This is in conjunction with my walks and Sunday stair climibing at Rhodes Memorial 

I want to win the challenge, purely because right about now, I could do with a win!

Also on Tuesday 19th August we're having our first Well I chat on the Facebook page
Be there!

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Ushering in August

This has been a tough year so far. I have learnt to embrace change and hold onto that fact tighter than anything else in the room.

I cant explain where my head is at right now, or where its been. My grief at times has seemed insurmountable, and my joys short lived. But yet here I am, carrying on.

I am in a state of change and not sure what's going to happen next. Its as if I've been on the merry-go-round and its spinning and the revolutions are slowing down enough that I can finally see a chance to step off. Which means I'm trying to control the crazy but doesn't mean I know what it is that I'm doing.

I took sometime off to sort out my old home life and while we got the house ready for tenants, I did have a few emotional moments. We basically neutralised my old home and well its just a house now.

I got back to CT yesterday and while this does seem to be my refuge right now. I am unsure of what the next year brings, my last few years have been about loss in many forms, friends, loved ones, ideas and trusts and hopefully it is all worth something in the end.

Right now, I just want to create a predictable home life and routine. I need predictable right now. And I also need to start vocalising things I need.

So here's to August, may it be the end of winter for me. and onward to Spring, Rebirth and Renewal

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

For Ridi, Muslim,Taoist, Fighter,Friend

June is a month that has been overshadowed by death and grieving and Ramadaan
As I start coming to terms with my moms passing which has been a carnival ride on its own. 

I search inwards and question upwards. A very good friend Ridwan called me when he heard the news and offered words of comfort as I knew her birthday was coming up on the 2nd of July. He spoke me off an emotional ledge that Sunday night and helped me cope. Nothing prepared me for the phone call on that 2nd July my moms 69th birthday, from Ridi's colleagues to tell me that he succumbed to a heart attack on that very day. Allah grant him Jannah, he was an amazing man and I will sorely miss his counsel and witty remarks about life. We had a pact, that if by 2015 neither of us were married, we would marry each other. There was so much of him I saw in myself. and I will honour his memory by trying to be the woman he saw in me

you are following your river
it flows freely when you untangle
and the hard times become good times
the duality of life
Aasia Fredericks
yin and yang
we have because at time we are without
won't know up
if there is no down
the balance is treating both the same
the hard part is to do that
good and bad are just the same thing
being indifferent is the hard part

You are a kind human being
Keep pressing the good fight
It is worth it all