For Ridi, Muslim,Taoist, Fighter,Friend

-
June is a month that has been overshadowed by death and grieving and Ramadaan
As I start coming to terms with my moms passing which has been a carnival ride on its own. 

I search inwards and question upwards. A very good friend Ridwan called me when he heard the news and offered words of comfort as I knew her birthday was coming up on the 2nd of July. He spoke me off an emotional ledge that Sunday night and helped me cope. Nothing prepared me for the phone call on that 2nd July my moms 69th birthday, from Ridi's colleagues to tell me that he succumbed to a heart attack on that very day. Allah grant him Jannah, he was an amazing man and I will sorely miss his counsel and witty remarks about life. We had a pact, that if by 2015 neither of us were married, we would marry each other. There was so much of him I saw in myself. and I will honour his memory by trying to be the woman he saw in me

Ridwan
wonderful
you are following your river
it flows freely when you untangle
and the hard times become good times
eventually
the duality of life
Aasia Fredericks
yin and yang
Ridwan
we have because at time we are without
true
won't know up
if there is no down
the balance is treating both the same
the hard part is to do that
good and bad are just the same thing
being indifferent is the hard part

You are a kind human being
Keep pressing the good fight
It is worth it all

Comments

Unknown said…
there's a thing that someone told me once, that life isn't good or bad, it is.

I'm not sure I believe it, but there's a gorgeous swathe of people that help you realise that a part of it can be true, and they help unlock that attitude and acceptance inside of you.

It sucks when they've gone, but it's almost a clever test they offer you: how would I deal with my being gone?

Or something
July 16, 2014 at 2:38 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hijab - my weakness

-
Image
So since 2016, I've been mostly in Hijab and its tough. I know why I started wearing it, and it was to be a daily reminder to find better ways of being. Friends and Family, don't always understand. I'm "less progressive now" what they don't know is I will still call you a p03$ in a headscarf. but the point is that I WANT to be better, be more God-conscious. Heres the rub though. Sometimes I get sick and tired of trying to be a better person. It's too damn hard and especially since acceptance came easier outside of wearing hijab.  going out, showing my hair and wearing what I please. regardless of modesty. I miss not giving a fuck! Then I try to do not give a fuck and then I feel miserable. because my stupid ass knows better. I hate it sometimes because this means something different to others than it does to me. but these hijabi barbies will still fucking judge me for not wearing it the "right way" or the "IN the way" and for
Read more

Talking Snack!

-
Image
I was so excited that Sham was finally coming to Joburg and thought the best way to tell the story was the way I remembered it, through the food we planned to eat, did eat and wanted to eat but were too full! Before you go any further, if you don't know who Sham is, you can fuck right off at this point. Because you should have clicked at the link above, saw her stuff and then kick yerself for not meeting her. and then proceed to read the rest of this blog in emerald shade of jealous green. T-3 days till #shaminjhb happened, I offered my services for the day to show them around. We knew it was a limited time frame because of the time they were coming in and also a braai that night, had to be prepped for. So we spoke about food, because well, food moves me. Decided we have to get samoosas for our walk about in the CBD, yes nay-saying joburgers the actual CBD. But first the samoosa's, "World of Samoosas " in the plaza was the only place one should ever buy samoo
Read more

The last 2 years

-
Image
Two years ago today, I instagram'd the moment I walked into my first retrenchment (I didn't know at the time) Last year today after being told I did an amazing job, I was asked to leave for not being a cultural fit. Hijab wearing muslim working for company who predominantly sold hard liquor, yeah I figured But I took the job because I had no other means of income. Its not lost on me, but I can't tell you what retrenchments does to your psyche, your confidence, your ability to say with certainty. I KNOW HOW TO DO MY JOB Between friends who gave generously of their time: my lawyer friend who helped me negotiate a package,  my social media friend who gave me some part time work to tide me over, to  the friend who gave me a home so I wouldn't have to worry about paying rent.  To the friend and her family who opened their home and fed me  all of you who helped me and helped me maintain a semblance of dignity. for those friends who made me cry and reminded me t
Read more